I look at all these chics and cant help but see the same, I blow past as they wave steady callin’ my name. And these niggas they got I done had that and moved on, cuz they tend to plant seeds and then straight get gone.
But its funny how the game on some real shit try to teach you, while the streets try to beat you, haters steady tryna defeat you. Its funny to me, nose in the sky they say Im stuck up, but I got my own problems and could basically give two fucks.
Who she sucked off, who he fucking it really doesn’t matter, when Peco knocking at the door that should cut all the laughter…I got bills, aint tryna fuck a nigga gone have me taking pills, waking up in cold sweats because of last night’s thrills.
He talk about he that bol, tryna figure whether to be wit the whores or the sluts, meanwhile Im stressing tryna get these kids ice cream from a truck
And its crazy they ask where daddy at, I tell em you busy, tell em you making moves all around the city, but you on the same block been there for ten years, played all my MJB albums and yet I aint never shed a tear, cuz dick that low aint worth the tissue to dry my cheeks off, aint worth the carpet on my stoop that I wipe my feet off.
Done fell in love with a hustler, but I aint read the disclosure, and now I see you in the streets and cant keep my composure
And the next nigga came along and said the same thing that you did, so I thank you for schooling me he tried to do what you did. And I done long replaced you but the door keep revolving, it’s like all of you’ll the same so the problem sees no solving.
And I fell in love wit a real nigga and he got his own issues, late nights he wanted to cry but no one handed him the tissues, he scared of being you, and his chic keep his balls blue, so he call me, but I cant see this being anything but untrue.
I done chalked him to the game same way I did you, and these little girls is grown walking around illiterate, tryna play mommy but cant read the script, passin they babies off to Keisha and Lil Pookie up the street, treading the pavement so much they bear calluses on the feet, and they would’ve made they son a Jr. if they only knew his daddy’s name, but he fucked you and ducked you, charge that to the game.
Ive grown to love the sirens at night cuz they put me to sleep, a lullaby of the ghetto never learned to count sheep. We learned shit like how to hit the ground in the middle of jumpin rope, cuz the corner boys is beefing with the cats that pump dope. And them niggas aint got shame, they bullets don’t got names, so when them little kids get slain, we charge that to the game. And Lil Tony he could’ve been a ball player or something, but since his mom is a pheen and his pop aint ‘bout nothing. He gone find comfort in them bars, made a home out the streets, days of cracking cigars, sold his soul and cant find the receipt. His world is 5 by 5 and he can’t break the chains, we write letter but for the most part charge that to the game.
Can you remember where you came from?
Royalty written in DNA, pours out through your skin and the Sun recognizes you.
Been on this journey so long that you forgot who you were, traded your throne for the stoop, and your crown for a coupe. Left your castle, left your child…lost Queens in the wild. Trying to remember, Where they were or where they maybe going. Have you forgotten? The life you had before picking cotton? When your father was a King and your mother a Queen, before you renounced your throne, identity unknown. Taught that you were a heathen, a blasphemous lie, truth written in the stars descendants of the Most High, building structures on this dimension that cant be reproduced, you’ve forgotten the knowledge and must be reintroduced. You were regal, and wise, power embedded in your eyes, now your crown bears cracks, less than an ordinary guy. And you refuse to reclaim the birthright when its yours, trying to teach you who you were but the truth gets ignored. The dynasty has ended, leaving the heirs with scars. Kings who traded in their royalty for chains and bars. And some say it was stolen, well when will you take it back, avenge the capture of your father, back when Egypt was black. I mean the story has been told about a million times over, yet still our Queens are kingless and we’ve murdered all our soldiers. Ancestors cant be smiling down on us, we’ve laid our gowns down in the dust. Memories imprinted in my soul, ancestry written on scrolls. And now the Queens give birth to sons abandoned, too bad that they’re misbegotten, when they were once Kings
Have you forgotten?
I want to experience the kundalini rising
Transferred energy from the golden horizon
Got sparks flying and electrons bursting, mouth watery for my tongue thirstin
Energy up my spine and neck, once all these ions attract or connect
Anxiety got me pulling drafts, visions of a chocolate shaft forces me to bite my lip,
But you don’t know the half, pulses like drums and it aint my heart beating, tried to push it aside but this feeling kept bleeding out from within me, and now I cant control
want to feel the Kundalini rising commanding freedom for my soul.
And Im waiting just to taste you. Light from your aura distracting my focus
Hearing music in my dreams like Mr. Holland’s Opus, and these visions of the sunset
Got me more than just open, got me pouring like the rain, sitting, waiting, hoping
Sending you my gravitational pull, even though your at a distance
Meditation wont clear you from my head, just you my bed, my tongue your head…
Mmmm that was deep, like the space I have to offer, feeling like melted butter nothing more slippery or softer.
And I swear Im not ungrateful, looking for the grand surprise, just look me in my eyes when we both feel the kundalini rise.
The friction, the contradiction…the static got me pheening. Like thunder, but the light travels fast induced by my own screaming like a symphony I play or a rhythm we record, written in the vibrations, frequencies I so adore. Like your fingers play the clarinet the melody goes on, from the sunset to the dawn, till the morning dew is gone. And a high like this cant be replaced no herbs, no martinis
Just me, you, and our energy…Im tryna feel the kundalini
Hanifah Abdul Khaleeq
Desert storm and War on terror, terrorizing and spilling blood
Trying to impose a system of hate, all in the name of love
But there’s a war outside my window curtains, burdens and miseducation
Drugs and lies, decriminalized. the enemy’s here within this nation.
A war between the men and police, that beat the brains from their skulls
Cant keep shooting their bullets when the budget is low, an evil war in hopes that neither of their kids will grow.
And what about the war between the pheen and the dealer, it may seem odd but nothing here is realer than to poison another to pay support, end up shooting him dead because he came up short
And my children they fight in this war everyday, just to make it to school and cannot detour or short cut just keep walking forward cuz when the school bell rings someone else gets shot.
I am a POW, doing a bid in these four walls I call my home, I cant run east cant send the children west, its all been declared a combat zone. And the opposition can not be seen but they’re out to see us resting, carried in a hearse laid in the earth while the war continues with the priest and the boy he’s molesting.
There is a war outside, and I can see it so clearly so I arm myself with knowledge and power, they tell me God just doesn’t exist as if we are not living in the Final Hour
The war won’t end between the soul and the flesh, between the man and his child or the questions of why he left. All these wars, good against evil, silence against noise, politicians against the people. No white flags waving, no Private Ryan saving, just refugees looking for a safe haven. But there’s no where to run, and not one place to hide.
As we raise these new age soldiers for the war outside….
I was born a woman, and I hate my skin.
Hate the burdens that I bear, and the places that I’ve been
They say I’m lucky that I’m breathing, well that there should be a sin
Because this life’s just too deceiving, no longer perceive what I believe in.
And the breaths I take now hesitate, the tears they wont stop falling
My heart it shutters…soul melts like butter, the demons wont stop calling
And this lonely place of mine is filled with faces that look the same
Pay a price for a piece of me, yet I’m the one to blame.
And the world around me is silent, while they’re drunk from the elixir
Won’t speak out against the violence, yet so quick to judge a sister
Like I need to hear their vile thoughts on top of all my shame
And this created mass of land is slowly decomposing, and we keep fanning the flame
The truth their not exposing, left me in the cold and freezing…greater later? Im not believing wish my mind would stop opposing so my lungs would just stop breathing.
And I know how this may sound but Ive never been in love with the world I mean look at what its become, look around at this slum. The women are now the men, and the men are magicians. Mysteriously they disappear, leave their children reminiscing and their sons grow up to be like them so what’s left for my daughters. The food they engineer and they’ve poisoned all the water. Cutting budgets from education so they can fund their wars, fuck books for my children they need guns that blow down doors. And the police must be clones the way they abuse their authority. Taking lives like it’s a game, slowly exterminating the minorities. And I have sons to raise keep praying they won’t play the dupe, praying they are not the target when these cowards decide to shoot. I can no longer trust a man it seems like they come but always leaving. Wish I could really call it quits, cut the shit and stop breathing…
I can see it everyday,
The nonsense
The violence
The Shaytan’s whispers, the voice of my conscience
And the tears that she cries goes unnoticed
And the morning after?
Same book different chapter
As you look upon her face and see the results of your rapture
Or the wrath that you poured as if you were her god.
And your hands kept beating down on her didn’t care that she cried
As you pushed away her son
Shit, he wasn’t your child
Another day
As the street lights flicker
On the face of a child neglected
Mother left bitter
Left the kids in the house
couldn’t pay for a sitter
Left the kerosene burning
No heat in the winter
And as the smoke cleared
And she realized her worst fears
Salvaged a picture of her children
8 months and 3 years
Same book different chapter
Silence the morning after
Like the Sunday morning guilt of the adulterous pastor
Preaching lies to a church filled with hypocritical laughter
Passing that basket around 3 times
Preaching greed’s a deadly sin
didn’t really believe in the words that you scribbled with that pen
Waiting for the hereafter?
Same book different chapter
The nonsense
The violence
The voice of my conscience
The Shaytan’s calls
These 4 white walls
Closing
These actors keep posing
The streets engulfed in flames
The single mothers pain
The deadbeat dad
The never ending game
The drugs and the guns
Molesting priest protected by the nuns
The pimps and the tricks
The trunks filled with bricks
And not the kind that build houses
And these things play a factor
In the never ending story
Same book different chapter
One hundred million people, I see one woman one man. Walking in unison bitter and bland. Hands over their eyes being led like sheep, and the dogs are nearby making sure they stay sleep.
Seems they’ve been exposed, like coke in the nose. Drugged by the illusion, stolen; foreclosed. Seized while they were napping or taking in sound waves. Now they walk in agreement like they’ve risen from the grave.
The exposure indeed has turned them into slaves…and it maybe too late to stop the poison at the source, when they’ve handed whips to men like Oliver North. And Halliburton and FEMA works in coalition, while Obama tells you lies to dissolve your suspicion. But what will you do when they throw you in those camps, because the bill has been written and the ink has been stamped and I’m not Jesse Ventura, this ain’t an Alex Jones series, it’s gets deeper than you labeling this a conspiracy theory. Our rights have been taken under false flag operations, no more Constitution…what Declaration? You’re no longer a soul but cattle instead, and that’s the only thing evident; the truth that went unsaid.
They got us all distracted and the price is our lives, while we converse about Weezy and Basketball Wives. And our children are worse so forget about the time to come, because the weed and the pills got their minds all numb, and we gave them the Ritalin, we made them get those vaccines that the enemy prescribed so many sterilized per diem.
And you’re a fool if you think Japan’s radiation didn’t reach us, but we’re the same fools that let our oppressors teach us. Let Glenn Beck tell us stories, that were cosigned by Mother Goose, but we love the fairy tales, we’ve accessorized the noose. We’re obtuse too dumb to see that Ron Paul is an agent and I know it sounds crazy but someone has to say it, and I have no fear I recognize the imposters that wanna label you a threat, and call you a monster. Your water has methane and your food is engineered but we love to eat McDonald’s, obsessed with the puppeteer. We’ve signed the dotted line and haven’t read the disclosure. Too deaf, dumb, and blind…delaying the exposure
I’ve turned cold on the inside,
Like the lost black mitten, buried in the snow
And I am buried too, black and unseen
Frigid and hard, waiting to be found
Or maybe hiding from the world
From the hurt and the scars
From the lies and deceit
Maybe digging deeper in the darkness
Trying to find my home in the bleak, bitter, blackness
A world full of nothing…silence and wounds
Loud screams of muteness, I think its safe here,
Here where no one can find me
No devils, or demons
No eye scorching light
And yes its cold here, freezing even
But the cold has numbed me, made me blue
Yet I’m preserved, in this wintry shelter
And I cant say for sure whether I’m lost or if I’m hiding
But either way no one comes searching or looking in the cold
In the blackness, in the hurt, no one hunting in the pain
Searching for me in the scars
I’ve dug deeper in the darkness, made this place my home
This silent world of nothing…
They told me love was pain, well maybe that explains…
Explains the wounds yet to be seen, when your weapon is in plain sight
But I don’t fight or attempt to defend I just follow the path hoping it doesn’t lead to a dead end, and I’d spend every dollar and every second of my life, rebuilding something love destroyed so we could live as man and wife
They said love was pain, and Im hurting to the bone, it’s like your presence comes to haunt me in the guise of your cologne and the unknown is more than frightening and most times Im unsure because you leave my mind wondering while Im staring at the phone
And I gave you my heart long before you even asked, yet the picture isn’t clear, at times you seem so cavalier, yet if the war is waged against us know Im facing the combat zone, sharpened my sword before I left just recognize that I cant fight this war alone.
Im addicted to the endorphins that this pain from love produces, and my friends they ask me why, so I give them lame excuses, and I admit sometimes I wanted to step down but the fight in me refuses, cuz the war just cant be won if I cant bear the bumps and bruises
A war that my heart chooses like Daniel faced the lions, and just because love is pain doesn’t mean that love’s prone to lying, and if I end up dying let my death not go in vain,
Although I should have seen it coming, shit they told me love was pain.
And if we part like the Red Sea, and let the people walk between us, could we endure the clock’s ticking and let time wean us like a child from the breast, lost like a man at sea hurt from thoughts that went repressed, or fate that just won’t let us be
Cuz I see me and I see you, but is this vision real cuz I was open with my heart and not one detail did I conceal, yes I reveal to you my everything hoping my heart doesn’t strain
And if it does then I’ll still be standing here, they told me love was pain.
The CIA is watching me sending currents thru my mind
Undefined my meaning, screening everything I do from what I watch to what I chew
And the Manchurian candidate was sitting in the front pew, he’s in the market where I shop, things in my home have been swapped
I’ve waken up in cold sweats from dreams of people crying over a coffin, but the face they wont reveal, I swear this vision felt so real.
And I keep seeing the same faces, when I travel different places. Cant tell the ones I love the most, they laugh as if this is a hoax.
And Tupac came to me and told me death was just right up the street, but I cant help but feel as though my mission’s incomplete
Im paranoid and its taken my life…interrupts my sleep
I cant help but think about the nights intoxicated, and I should have been praying
Thinking I should circumnavigate, so the world can hear what I am saying
My mind has long left me and Im wondering who stole it, my soul is rebelling against me and Im wondering if I sold it. Trying to figure out when I leave was I loyal to this deen, who is going to teach my children the siratul mustaqeem. Im raising freedom fighters, will they avenge my death? Use the right to fight the left, speak the truth with every breath. Cuz if the magic bullet hits them too, then who will wake the masses, who will be the savior for all the lower classes? Gases seeping in my home and I can taste it in the water. So I embed Angela Davis inside the minds of my daughters. Got to raise these Malcolm X’s and these Sojourner Truths before they catch me while Im distracted sort of like Lincoln and John Booth.
And if he gets me, know he didn’t act alone, I saw a girl who looked just like me wondering if she is a clone, because I came from surgery on my stomach left with scars on my back and I feel like something’s missing, was my womb left intact?
They say I suffer from anxiety, keep looking at the clock, I found my door wide open when I know I left it locked, its like they’re leaving me their hints, want to see me in the state of shock. Keep seeing the shooter in my dreams on the day Kennedy was shot.
I swear the men in black are real stealing memories with a flash, and they hold those secret meetings and bear the symbols on my cash, and someone broke into my thoughts, but thank God Im conscious even in my dreams, and the angels protect me thanx to Ar-Rahmaanir Ar-Rahim
Im coming down with a cold but they offered me a vaccine, and they don’t want me dead or alive just somewhere in between
Yes Im paranoid so I stay in the shadows, I move behind the scene. And they think that they can hold me back, think I wont intervene. Im looking twice behind my back to better analyze the delusions, probing all of the illusions, until I reach my life’s conclusion fitting the pieces and reflecting on the void, because Im way too young to be this paranoid.
